Facebook Official

In this day and age, every major event in your life must be appropriately and immediately documented via Facebook. This social networking site must be the first to be notified of every significant event and decision. This is true for your love life as well.

Everyone always wants to know your relationship status at any given point. And your relationship, whether it's been five weeks or five years, is not validated unless it's "Facebook Official".


Whenever you're in relationship purgatory and there are no particular "titles" explaining and describing your relationhip to other people it can be difficult. Telling a story about your significant other you want to say "My boyfriend said such and such" but technically he's not your boyfriend. Someone asks you if you're in a relationship and you take a long pause. You want to say yes, but the true answer is no, but you're so confused about the blurred lines that you end up saying "uh, yeah kinda". And then you stare off into space wondering how the person you're speaking of would answer the question if/when someone asks them...?

The ups and downs of relationships are only compounded by the publicity of constant notications of "single", "in a relationship", and the ever-dreaded "it's complicated" status. Many are now opting to remove the relationship status alltogether to alleviate the woes of putting your business out there. Choosing not to list whether or not you are in a relationship or who you're in a relationship with can rid you of the constant questioning of your relationship status from your facebook friends, but it can also lead to another problem.

When you are in a relationship the first question you get is, "Is it Facebook Official?". And the answer to that question determines the legitimacy of your relationship in the eyes of the facebook world. But if you really care about someone, and they care about you, that's all that should matter. Labels and titles are beautiful and important to define the parameters of your relationship, but in the grand scheme of things, they only matter in terms of marriage.

So I vote for a new "courting" option of relationship status! What do you think? Is your relationship legit even if it's not Facebook Official?

Summer Vacation

It's that time of year again! The time all college students leave their cares behind and head for some beach somewhere. Cancun. St. Thomas. Miami. Jamaica. The point is to get away and leave all of the stressors of school behind you. After exams are finally over, you may think it's a good idea to go on a vacation with your boyfriend, but is that really for the best??

Sometimes, it can be too early in the relationship to take such a big step. Going on vacation is difficult enough with your family, (insert horrible childhood road trip experience here) so you have to be sure that you are 100% ready to attempt something like this with your significant other. You really learn what someone's made of when you are stuck in a car with them (or on a plane, or on a train...). I have gotten in several fights over directions going a few miles up the street, so that's definitely not what you want on a long distance trip!

While going on vacation with your boo can have negative outcomes, it could have a very positive one as well. Going away together could be a great way to see his habits in a way that you would if you were to live together, without the messiness of moving in, splitting bills, and getting in over your head! On the trip, pay attention to how he brushes his teeth. If he squeezes the toothpaste down to the end and you don't like that, take note. And it's up to you to decide if that's something you can live with or not, but at least now you'll know!

Another thing to be mindful of is how he handles certain situations. For instance, if there is an unforseen issue with the hotel reservation and he blows up on the front desk clerk, that may be a red flag for you! Take note of how he interacts in this situation because it is when people are out of their element that they are most likely to show their true colors.

Susan Johnston, a freelance writer who covers career and lifestyle topics, had a great article on Taking Your First Vacation Together.

Her top 4 suggestions were:
1. Agree on a destination
2. Start small
3. Allow for time apart
4. Decide on who's paying for what before you leave

I think all four recommendations are appropriate, but my two favorite are #2 and #4. There is nothing worse, than fighting about money on a trip that is supposed to be fun and relaxing. Work out all of the details at home in a way that is civil and fair for both parites. While many of my friends recommended a trip to Vegas or a cruise to the islands (and that sounds nice), I am a firm believer in putting your pinkie toe in the water before you dive in! If you start out small and are successful, there's always room for bigger & better trips together!

But the most important thing when going on your first "sleep away" trip is to HAVE FUN!!!