Money Matters Monday: When 2 Become 1

While I am not quite ready for marriage... I do like to occassionally get my ducks in a row (or at least think about doing so) in the meantime. For the Money Matters Monday segment I want to focus on money and relationships. When it comes to love and loot, Are you Financially ready to join another person?

When you're single, you can be as frivolous with money as you want. Go out to eat all you want. Buy those fabulous pairs of shoes and the matching handbags. You can loan money to friends and you can basically live month to month, paycheck to paycheck without concern for saving for the future. But if you have any plans for co-habitating, getting married, or having a family in the future you may want to consider some financial planning.

Knowing where you stand in terms of fiscal fitness will help with your relationship because you will be well-equipped to join forces with another person if you plan for that future now. You may be dating someone now or you may be single, but either way when the time comes for you to buy a house, plan a wedding, have kids, and send those kids to college, you want to be financially able to do so. One of my favorite sayings is, if you fail to plan, you plan to fail.

It would be beneficial to have an emergency fund for a rainy day, a retirement fund, or at least a savings account. Years fly by and before you know it you look up and you are at the stage in your life that you remember only dreaming about. Even if you don't think you want to get married or have kids, wouldn't it be better to just save up for these things just in case they happen?

If, for instance, a couple began saving just $50 each per month six months into the relationship and dated for five and a half years before getting engaged, they would have $6000 saved for a wedding. Personally, I don't think weddings should cost that much, but the average wedding cost is estimated between $14,868 and $24,476 (excluding the cost for engagement rings and a honeymoon)!

And don't forget about kids! About half of Americans choose to have children and about half do not, but if you do decide to have children, that also impacts your finances. Raising a kid from birth to age 18 will cost an estimated $178,590! And that is not including the cost of college.

While getting married and having kids may not sound like financial decisions they are actually all dollars and cents (and love and emotion lol). So take some time to plan ahead! Depending on what stage in your life you are currently, your financial plan and goals will vary, but just make sure you put a plan in action. Don't just stop there, actually follow through!

There are 5 Main Steps in the Financial Planning Process (Kewon, 2007)

1. Evaluate Your Financial Health
2. Define Your Financial Goals
3. Develop a Plan of Action
4. Implement Your Plan
5. Review Your Progress, Reevaluate, and Revise Your Plan

Roommate Rules

I recently moved into an apartment with two of my closest friends. I was so excited! My first apartment - the official transition from the twin bed to the full. A kitchen. A washer and dryer. A full size fridge. These were all things I had missed while living on campus (though I enjoyed my time there) and had saved to thoroughly enjoy in my senior year. What I didn't expect, however, was how living in an apartment would change my relationship with my roomies. But I quickly learned that living with roommates can truly prepare you for living with a future mate.

Like I said, these are not random roommates, these are close friends, so this is not a blog to bash them, nor am I saying they are terrible roommates. I am simply expressing the fact that in every relationship there must be communication, cooperation, and consideration. These three Cs will ease almost any living situation!

Communication is key to express your thoughts. I suck at expressing myself to those I love. I am a Communication Studies major and have little to no problem expressing myself in many aspects of my life. But for some strange reason I avoid communicating with the people closest to me at all costs. I am terrified of hurting their feelings or damaging the relationship so I usually tend to keep my feelings to myself. But it is important to speak up! (I'm learning and trying) If you feel a certain way, but don't tell your roommate, they will never know! So you may be upset that they left the dishes in the sink, but if you never tell them they'll have no idea.

Cooperation is also imperative to have a successful roommie relationship. For instance, I got so upset that the trash was just piling up, but one day I just asked myself, "What's more important - being upset that no one took the trash out or having no piles of trash in the house?" And as it turns out, taking the trash out myself made me feel much better than waiting around on someone else to do it. So sometimes you just have to work together and realize that the other person is not trying to do the little things that annoy you on purpose, they may have just had a busy day. Just be grateful that leaving the toilet seat up is not an issue (yet)!

Consideration is the last of the 3 Cs and probably the most important. Keep in mind that you are probably doing things to annoy them too. Wouldn't you want them to be considerate of your feelings and respectful of your needs. Most people in college nowadays grew up with a room to their selves and are not used to sharing space with people who do things completely different. We all grew up in different households and have been taught to do things differently. You have to learn to be considerate of each other and work things out.

Living with a roommate is the closest thing to being married as you're gonna get (without getting married). Think of it as your dress rehearsal and treat your roommates as you would want to be treated. The most important thing to remember is Don't Sweat the Small Stuff (and it's all small stuff!). That's not only the title of an excellent book, but it is also very true and very applicable. So the next time your roomie (or hubby) leaves a load in the dryer for three days, ask yourself, "In the grand scheme of things, does it matter??" NO!

PS - I love my Girlfriends