Dinner for One

Is it okay to eat alone?

So I went to a Mexican restaurant (because I love Mexican food) and grabbed lunch on my break. The woman basically kicked me out, didn't even ask if I wanted my food "for here or to go". She just bagged it up and assumed I couldn't possibly be dining in since I was by myself. And of course my first thought was How Rude!

Sometimes when I'm working I like to dine in on my lunch break just to get a new environment for one hour out of the day. But for some reason being alone is a "to-go only" zone. It made me mad, but I just took my bagged almuerza (lunch) and headed back to the break room.

The truth of the matter is she was actually making a reasonable assumption because most people don't like eating out alone. I've even been known to whip the cell phone to call people just so I didn't have to sit there awkwardly eating by myself. And you don't necessarily care so much that you are alone. It's moreso the fact that everyone else is feeling sorry for you being alone that bothers you most.

It is going to be very difficult, but you have to take pride in eating alone ... build your self esteem. The importance of eating alone is about developing a relationship with yourself. Date yourself. You have to, at some point, be okay with being alone. Even though eating is traditionally a social event - meeting friends, holidays with family, or even romantic dates - we must find the confidence to just be at the table and wine and dine ourselves. The big piece that will be missing from dining alone as opposed to joining friends or family is the conversation. We all use the time while our food is being prepared to catch up and talk about our days, but one blogger suggest you bring a book or newspaper to occupy your time. Catch up on the news or delve into a good novel! So Bon Apetit!

Where to go when you date yourself
1. To the Movies
2. To get a Mani/Pedi
3. To walk at the park
4. To get a Massage
5. To work out at the gym
6. To the bookstore to read
7. And of course out to eat!

Here's What You Said on Twitter:
DynamicDelight RT @sexintheville: Can you eat out by yourself?<-Yea, but you look like a creeper/ loser
DIRTY479 @sexintheville: No way cuzo!! lol
kristinnsmith @sexintheville: Definitely, as long as the restaurant isn't busy, otherwise I'd feel awkward

Childless Generation??

To continue on in the subject of the Career vs. Family issue I want to discuss a study I came across on AOL News. According to a recent study done by the Pew Research Center, 1 in 5 women of childbearing age (about 40) are opting not to have children.

Once again I will mention that I am nowhere near the "childbearing years" (well I guess biologically I am but you know what I mean). This study doesn't directly effect me (yet), but I do find it to be quite interesting.

The study found three main reasons in this change in women's titles or roles in society. The first reason was a recent trend in delayed marriage as well as delayed childbearing. And if you do the math it actually makes sense. Graduate from high school at 18, spend four years in college and graduate at 22, perhaps a couple years in grad school (to be an oberachiever and go for the Master's). By the time you finish your education you're 24 and then it's just time to start moving up in your career. And education and your career is at least something you can plan. Falling in love and getting married... not so much.

The second reason pointed to the diminished social pressure to have children. Having children used to be just the thing you did after marriage. Married with kids seemed to be some sort of predestined job description for women in years past. Now, however, birth control and the Women's Rights Movement have prompted a great deal of options and control for women. Our destiny is now in our hands. You don't necessarily have to have kids. It's now becoming an option for those who choose to do so, and when they choose to do so.

The study also found that there are now expanded job opportunities for women. Women used to go to school to get their "M-R-S degree", but now going to college is about much more than finding a man to marry. Women are more focused on gaining an education and more centered on reaching their goals.

In the end, it only matters that every woman is happy with her decision. Women are finding that those without kids "are not more depressed" and have a psychological well-being just as high as those with children. You just have to make a decision that best fits you, whether it's putting off the soccer mom thing or avoiding it altogether!