From Boo to Woo

Do you ever notice those girls at the club or the bar who are just so ridiculously excited for absolutely no reason at all? Those are what you call "Woo Girls". These are the girls that get hype when their favorite song (or any song) comes on and abnoxiously yell "Wooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!". These women are completely and utterly ecstatic about life. There is nothing you could do or say to them that would ruin their good mood. They are not angry or bitter at all. They're a little bit annoying, but only if you are an outsider. If you are not a woo girl you are a boo girl. Boo girls are angry and bitter and there is nothing you could do or say to lift there mood. These girls are the ones in the background going "Booooooooooooooo" while the Woo Girls are dancing and yelling and cheering.

If you're a Woo Girl, good for you. Stay positive and keep living it up with your single gals on the ladies nights out. Enjoy while you're young and single and fabulous. But remember, the life of a Woo Girl is not meant to be forever. It's supposed to be a temporary thing. For your early college years, your twenties maybe, but definitely not forever. At some point you have to grow up and stop shouting!

Now if you're a Boo Girl, stop it. Stop being so negative all the time. You will never get out of your boo-love-is-for-losers mentality if you keep it up. Being a Boo Girl is okay every now and again. Sometimes you need to be the one on the outside looking in judging the Woo Girls and realizing that nothing in life is that dern exciting. But sometimes it's okay to be a Woo Girl and live it up for that one night only!  Stop being such a Negative Nancy and enjoy life.

To move from a Woo Girl to a Boo Girl is easy. It's called growing up. Get a reality check at some point in the future and grow up. But don't let that Woo Girl in you die completely. Sometimes it's okay to let her back out every now and again. But to make the transition from Boo to Woo is no easy task. You have to will yourself to be happy and carefree. More importantly, you have to surround yourself with Woo Girls (or others willing to attempt to wooo). You cannot and will not woo alone. (Hence why you always see Woo Girls in groups of three or more). You have to make it a mission before you leave the house that you are going to woo at some point in the night out. Set the goal and follow through.

A 'Woo girl' - a single girl who loves to go out partying and constantly shouts "woooooo!"

"She's A Woo Girl" (How I Met Your Mother)

How to Go From Boo to Woo

1. Get some liquid courage
2. Look fabulous
3. Go out with other Woo Girls
4. Step outside your comfort zone
5. If you get bored, move to a new location

The Absence of You

The Absence of You

I have nothing to distract me from the absence of you

My distractions are all gone and you’ve left too

I think of you night and day

You seem to haunt me that way

And there’s nothing to distract me from the absence of you

There’s nothing to distract me from the absence of you

You’ve crept into my brain and you’ve stayed there too

Your body’s been gone but the memories linger on

And there’s nothing to distract me from the absence of you

There’s nothing to distract me from the pain of you

I wish I could hurt you so you’d feel it too

One heart bleeds while the other heart leaves

And there’s nothing to distract me from the pain of you.

The Unhappy Un-Anniversary

So what do you do when a certain day of the year comes around and you suddenly remember that it used to be significant? You're just walking around all day remembering that date... but that date that was once so special is now just another day. . .

Gotta fix that calendar I have
That's marked July 15th
Because since there's no more you
There's no more anniversary

    - Ne-yo, "So Sick" lyrics

Forgetting the date is better than remembering the date. Remembering the date makes the whole day one big depressing re-run. You end up just walking around aimlessly angry at every happy couple. The key to making it through this day is to try to remember to forget it. But if you can't seem to avoid calendars and other reminders, just live in the depression. It can be purifying to allow yourself to feel these emotions. Call your best friend and tell them what the day is or was and what it means to you and how it makes you feel. Get those thoughts outside of your head and that could be just the cure for your heartache. Sometimes when you're going through a break up you don't really mourn the relationship because you're trying to convince yourself you're okay and "happy" being single. But when the anniversary rolls around you remember that you haven't had a chance to feel your feelings. So take this day and allow yourself to be all in your feelings.

But don't wallow too long! You can't allow the sadness to affect your overall state of mind. He who angers you, controls you. It is very important to move on and not let this one date on the calendar affect your whole day. Don't spend the day wondering what they're doing, what they're thinking and if they're hurting like you are. Instead, try to distract yourself from this day. Do what you normally do or do something new and exciting! Just make sure you have a good day and most of all, RELAX.

Relationships are hard and break-ups are harder and sometimes it can take you longer than you'd expect to get over someone. Someone once said it takes half the length of the relationship to get over your ex. So if you were together for four years it could take two years to fully recover! That seems like a really long time so in the meantime, you just have to be patient with yourself. Be understanding when it gets a little difficult. Just have a strong support system of friends and family who can help you remember that everything happens for a reason.

Top Ten Things Not to do on your Un-Anniversary

1. Take long walks near bridges
2. Watch Romantic Comedies
3. Hang out with friends who are in relationships
4. Drunk dial your ex
5. Drunk text your ex
6. Flip through old pictures from the "good times"
7. Go on a shopping spree that you can't afford
8. Stuff your face with chocolate and ice cream
9. Go on a first date
10. Facebook stalk your ex and/or their new boo

Here's what you said on Facebook!

SIV:   What do you do when your ex-anniversary comes around...? How do you handle it?

JB:     text him and say happy friendaversary :)
AW:   Go out. get trashed. & never look back <3.

Love is for Losers!

Do you ever just get to the point where you are just tired of the whole idea of love?

Well I do! I feel like we go through the ups and downs of these emotional roller coasters of love and sometimes it can really be exhausting. Your heart is a muscle afterall so I believe that all of the stress and strain that we place on it in the process of love can possibly wear it out.

 We go through so much in relationships sometimes and we don't allow ourselves time to heal and repair. Our hearts are much more fragile than we think. I know that just talking with my best friends about their guy problems hurts my heart, so surely it must be that much worse when you're going through it.

Because of all of the ups and downs that relationships (and non-relationships) put you through, it becomes difficult to make it through your day to day with a heavy heart of hurt. I sometimes find myself just angry at those who are in happy relationships because of all of my heart hurt. Sometimes you just get to a point where you're just like "Booooo love!" in the words of one of my dear friends. Lol

It seems like everywhere I turn there's some happy-go-lucky couple with their kissy-face profile pics or some overly excited girlfriend talking about how much she misses her boo when she just saw him earlier that day! And don't even get me started on romantic comedies. Now don't get me wrong, I love me some rom-coms but sometimes when I'm in one of those love-is-for-losers moods, I just want to hurl the remote at the tv screen!

 I have come to the conclusion that I am just going to have to take this time to get to know myself. I don't even have the energy to fall or be in love right now. I'm so focused on me that I cannot even concern myself with another person. So for now, this hopeless romantic will just not be in the mood for sappy "love".

Love is for Losers! Rom Coms to avoid:

• The Notebook
• When Harry Met Sally
• You've Got Mail
• Sleepless in Seattle
• Bridget Jones's Diary
• Notting Hill
• Titanic

Are You Really Ready?

So this weekend I went on a Single's Retreat and it really gave me some perspective about life as a single woman. And I had to ask myself... Do You Really Want a Relationship?

Sometimes, when it seems like all of your friends are coupled up, engaged, or married, you find yourself wondering, 'Why can't I have that?' or 'Why can't I find someone?'. But in all actuality, you may not have someone because you may not be ready for a relationship! You have to assess your single self and make sure you are really ready before you ask for a mate or sometimes even a date!

One of the most important things to do before you even worry about being in a relationship is to enjoy your time being single! We spend so much time searching for the next relationship that we forget to appreciate being alone. Once you find the one person you know you want to spend the rest of your life with, well, you have the rest of your life to be with them! But while you are single, it's so important to enjoy being single. You need to enjoy not having to be supportive and always having to be there for someone else. Enjoy being able to pick up and go when you want to. Enjoy your time with your friends. Enjoy living your life unattached to another person.

The second thing to do is somewhat similar to the first, but you have to get to know yourself. You have to know and fully understand what it means to be 1 before you become 2. Too often women go straight from their father's house to their husbands house, from raising their younger siblings to raising their own children without taking time to be on their own. If you never have a chance to live life on your own and make your own rules you will never really know what you like or who you are even. Take this opportunity as a single person to date yourself. Treat yourself to dinner and a movie or something that really makes you happy. Dating yourself will reassure you that you don't need someone else to provide happiness or joy for you. It's nice when someone is in your life and makes you happy, but you have to learn how to be content with yourself.

The most important thing to do before you even think about pairing up with another person is to prepare for your future. We all walk around with these mental checklists of what type of man or woman we want, but do we ever stop to think about their checklist? Are you the type of person someone would want to marry? Tall, dark and handsome. Funny, smart, and kind. Passionate, open-minded and a good cook. Become the type of husband or wife someone would want. Make a list of all of the things you want in a relationship and then make sure you can check off those things for yourself. You should work on gaining some life skills in the meantime too. Learn how to balance your checkbook and manage your finances. Have your own apartment for a while and know what it means to pay rent and utilities. Be able to bring something to the table when the time comes.

Even though it's difficult being single, don't envy those in a relationship because your time will come! So the next time you see your Facebook friend's relationship status change, don't feel bad about yourself, just realize that it is not your time yet. Being in a relationship requires a lot of time and effort and you just may not be ready for everything that means yet. In the meantime, become the best you that you can be and accomplish some of your goals before you become a we.

Going out with the Girls!

There are times in life when it pays to be in a relationship and there are times when it pays to be single! When you get invited to a wedding it would be nice to have a date. When you get invited to a date party it would be nice to have a date. When you are sitting at Applebee’s and the waitress is selling that 2 for $20 meal … it would be nice to have a date. But when you’re going out on the town with your best girlfriends (or guy friends for the fellas) that is when it really pays to be single.

When you think about it, going out is your chance to hang out with your girlfriends and just have a good time, whether you're in a relationship or not. If you want to boo-love, then you probably should just stay home. No one wants a party pooper, thinking about, talking about, (or worse) calling their significant other while everyone else is trying to have a good time.

When you're in a committed relationship you have an obligation to that other person to let them know where you are, where you're going, when you're gonnna get there, and what time you'll be back. But when you're single... you have so much freedom! You can leave when you want and get back when you want and not have to worry about remembering to text so-and-so on the way. If you're out with your friends and you all suddenly decide to go to Waffle House (or Huddle House in the 'Ville) it's okay! It's hard to have friends when you're in a relationship. By the time you finish doing your homework, attending meetings, working out, and having some couple time with your boo, there's no time for friends! You may see your friends at work or in class, but other than that, you just don't have time to kick it anymore when you're in a relationship.

Another good aspect of being single when you're going out is the fact that you can get as many numbers as you want GUILT FREE! Theoretically you could give and get numbers when you're in a relationship, but then you have to go through the extra effort of hiding it. And that's no fun. That's just extra unnecessary work. When you're single you can talk to people and actually enjoy meeting new people. And you can dance! You don't have to just hold up the wall all night, but you can dance. It's perfectly fine and you don't have to worry about being tagged in pictures later and it getting back to your significant other.

The most important thing to remember, whether you're in a relationship, single, or somewhere in between is to have fun. We're young and life is so not that serious at this point in our lives. Your twenties are for living life to the fullest and enjoying every moment. So from getting ready with the girls in the mirror to talking about how many numbers you got on the way home, just live and let live.

Top 10 Reasons Being Single Sucks
1. You're single
2. There's no one to cuddle with
3. After a while you just run out of people to text
4. You don't have anyone to split the 2 for $20 at Applebee's with
5. Your friends feel sorry for you when you're the 3rd Wheel
6. You eventually get tired of dancing to Beyonce's "Single Ladies"
7. Going to weddings alone... #epicfail
8. You miss the frequent hugs and kisses
9. When you have a terrible day you have no one to complain to (who really cares)
10. You're single

Here's What You Said on Twitter:
Is it better to go to a party solo or with a date??
Plug_McEnroe @sexintheville "Solo who takes sand to the beach!"

Career Crossroads

Flight Attendant, Lawyer, Photographer, Journalist. Though I've had several dreams and aspirations of what to be when I "grow up", I pretty much had it settled that I would become a reporter by eighth grade. Most men, however, are still figuring it out... Why?!

Why is it that men always seem to be wandering through life aimlessly or chasing some pipe dream? Meanwhile, women are so focused on chasing their careers that they have absolutely no time to chase (or be chased by) a man.

I'm not sure if it began with Rosie the Riveter or if it started when mass amounts of women went to work in the 80s, but somewhere along the way women took over the corporate world. It seems to me that women are just much more focused on their careers than men, starting as early as high school. Women are more focused and concerned about applying to colleges, taking all the AP classes, and getting a high GPA to get into the best schools possible. Men wait until the last possible minute to apply to colleges, are less likely to take AP or Dual Enrollment courses, and tend not to put forth the extra effort in class and just do enough to get by.

Then once we get to college, the proof is in the pudding. The proportion of men to women at universities and colleges today is unbelievable. "There are more men than women ages 18-24 in the USA — 15 million vs. 14.2 million, according to a Census Bureau estimate last year. But nationally, the male/female ratio on campus today is 43/57, a reversal from the late 1960s and well beyond the nearly even splits of the mid-1970s." (USA Today) At my school the statistics are worse than the national average, at only 31% male.

This recent trend presents us with several problems in our love lives. For starters, if men are flaky and women are focused in their career worlds than they will be the same way in their relationships. Men will treat the relationship as something casual and less concrete until they have narrowed in on a career path. They cannot fully commit to you until they no what their purpose in life is and how they can adequately provide for you. It's in their nature. We are not historically, the head of the household, so we tend to be less concerned with the weight that comes with trying to provide for a family.

Another issue with this is the fact that it forces women to choose between their romance and their careers. It's difficult for women to find love when they are surrounded by men who are going nowhere fast. We need partners who will uplift us, encourage us, inspire us. But instead we end up motivating them into a career. Eventually either he leaves because he feels inferior or she leaves in search of someone on her level. It's a lose-lose situation either way.

This is a never-ending issue that we all face at one point or another, but all we can do is be patient. Keep chasing your dream and your dream guy will appear at the right time. But whatever you do, never settle for less than your best.

Why I Need A Man

I must say that I am an independent woman. I can buy my own, take care of my own, and make it in a lot of things on my own. But when it comes to certain things in life ... the fact of the matter is I still need a man.

To make a long story short, my car just decided to act up and I of course I had no idea what to do. I called my first line of defense immediately - my mom, my dad, and my sister. But they were no help at all. At the end of the day I just had to make a decision on my own.

But I really needed a man to make a good mechanical decision because when it comes to cars I am completely clueless. I call my dad for help, but with him being so far away it would really help to have someone closer who could give me advice. I am pretty good about staying calm in stressful situations like this, but my biggest concern is that I will make the wrong choice as the mechanics spit out all of this information with their technical auto jargon of things that "have to be done". Are they just trying to get over on me because I'm a woman? Are they really looking out for my best interest?

I guess I'll never really know. And I'll never really know or understand why there are certain things in life that women still need men for, but in the meantime I will just try to utilize Google! I will make every effort to research and learn more about cars to educate myself so I won't end up in this situation again. As nice as it is to be dependent on men to do the masculine things, I must move beyond the stereotype and teach myself how to help myself. I am going to stay on top of my regular maintinance and services, get an auto emergency kit, and start saving to have emergency funds. I will be prepared for those times when there's just not a man around!


What I Need A Man For
1. Procreation
2. Companionship
3. Kill A Spider
4. Open Jars
5. Not-so-honest opinion
6. Meaningless Facts
7. Comfy Sleep Clothes
8. Lawn Work
9. Take out the Trash
10. Car Repair

Dinner for One

Is it okay to eat alone?

So I went to a Mexican restaurant (because I love Mexican food) and grabbed lunch on my break. The woman basically kicked me out, didn't even ask if I wanted my food "for here or to go". She just bagged it up and assumed I couldn't possibly be dining in since I was by myself. And of course my first thought was How Rude!

Sometimes when I'm working I like to dine in on my lunch break just to get a new environment for one hour out of the day. But for some reason being alone is a "to-go only" zone. It made me mad, but I just took my bagged almuerza (lunch) and headed back to the break room.

The truth of the matter is she was actually making a reasonable assumption because most people don't like eating out alone. I've even been known to whip the cell phone to call people just so I didn't have to sit there awkwardly eating by myself. And you don't necessarily care so much that you are alone. It's moreso the fact that everyone else is feeling sorry for you being alone that bothers you most.

It is going to be very difficult, but you have to take pride in eating alone ... build your self esteem. The importance of eating alone is about developing a relationship with yourself. Date yourself. You have to, at some point, be okay with being alone. Even though eating is traditionally a social event - meeting friends, holidays with family, or even romantic dates - we must find the confidence to just be at the table and wine and dine ourselves. The big piece that will be missing from dining alone as opposed to joining friends or family is the conversation. We all use the time while our food is being prepared to catch up and talk about our days, but one blogger suggest you bring a book or newspaper to occupy your time. Catch up on the news or delve into a good novel! So Bon Apetit!

Where to go when you date yourself
1. To the Movies
2. To get a Mani/Pedi
3. To walk at the park
4. To get a Massage
5. To work out at the gym
6. To the bookstore to read
7. And of course out to eat!

Here's What You Said on Twitter:
DynamicDelight RT @sexintheville: Can you eat out by yourself?<-Yea, but you look like a creeper/ loser
DIRTY479 @sexintheville: No way cuzo!! lol
kristinnsmith @sexintheville: Definitely, as long as the restaurant isn't busy, otherwise I'd feel awkward